Best Loki Quotes

We’re back with another Best Quotes Post. This time it’s Best Loki Quotes from the new Disney+ “Loki” Series. You knew there’d be some because the God of Mischief is fantastic with one-liners and funny as all get out. We have 6 movies with funny Loki-isms to drop in everyday conversation and we’re about to get 6 episodes worth of Best Quotes from Loki Series on Disney+ to add to them!

Best Loki Quotes Disney Plus

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 1, “Glorious Purpose”

It’s been a very long day, and I think I’ve had my fill of idiots in armored suits telling me what to do, so, if you don’t mind, this is actually your last chance. Now get out of my way. –Loki

Know this. if you cross me, there will be deadly consequences. –Loki

Absolutely not. This is fine Asgardian leather. –Loki

What? “To my knowledge?” Do a lot of people not know if they’re robots? –Loki

What if I was a robot and I didn’t know it? –Loki

This is a mistake! I shouldn’t be here. –Loki

Time-Keepers? The Sacred Timeline? Who actually believes this bunkum? –Loki

Madam, a god doesn’t plead. –Loki

Look, this has been a very enjoyable pantomime, but I’d like to go home now. –Loki

Oh, believe me, you can smell the cologne of two Tony Starks. –Loki

You ridiculous bureaucrats will not dictate how my story ends. –Loki

Are you taking me somewhere to kill me? –Loki

The idea that your little club decides the fate of trillions of people across all of existence at the behest of three space lizards? Yes, it’s funny. It’s absurd. –Loki

 

For the record, this really does feel like a killing-me kind of room. –Loki

Trust is for children and dogs. There’s only one person you can trust. –Loki

The first and most oppressive lie ever uttered was the song of freedom. –Loki

The Time-Keepers have built quite the circus, and I see the clowns are playing their parts to perfection. –Loki

I know what this place is, it’s an illusion. It’s a cruel, elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear. A desperate attempt at control. Now, you all parade about as if you’re the divine arbiters of power in the universe. –Loki

I can’t go back, can I? Back to my timeline. –Loki

I don’t enjoy hurting people. I don’t enjoy it. I do it because I have to, because I’ve had to. Because it’s part of the illusion. It’s the cruel, elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear. –Loki

Even an Infinity Stone is useless here. The TVA is formidable. –Loki

 

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 2, “The Variant”

Your TVA propaganda is exhausting. –Loki

I see a scheme and in that scheme I see myself. –Loki

My people by nature are gullible fools. My teeth were sharp but my ears even sharper. –Loki

Those you underestimate will devour you. –Loki

I have a new purpose. I am a servant of the sacred timeline. –Loki

I need assurances I won’t be completely disintegrated as soon as the job is done. –Loki

It is adorable that you think you could possibly manipulate me. I’m 10 steps ahead of you. –Loki

I don’t need your sympathy. –Loki

I can do whatever I want to do because the apocalypse is coming. –Loki

I’d never stab anyone in the back. That’s such a boring form of betrayal…I’ll never do it again because it got old. –Loki

You can trust one thing. I love to be right. –Loki

We’re all going to die anyway. –Loki

Be free my horn friends, be free! –Loki

Enjoy your last meal while you can. Nothing matters! –Loki

I know something children don’t. That no one bad is ever truly bad and no one good is ever truly good.

 

 

That was me using magic to dry my clothes. –Loki

If you could possibly sheath your smarm for a moment, I have an offer for you. –Loki

I would never treat me like this. –Loki
 

Who created you, Loki? If you think too hard about where any of us came from, who we truly are, it sounds kind of tedious. Existence is chaos. Nothing makes any sense so we try to make any sense of it. I’m just lucky that the chaos I emerged into gave me all this–my own glorious purpose. The TVA is my life and it’s real because I believe it’s real. –Mobius

Everything is written–the past, present, and future. There’s no such thing as free will. –Loki

So, you’re the fool the TVA brought in to hunt me down. –The Variant
Me, I presume. –Loki
Please. If anyone’s anyone, you’re me. –The Variant
How nice to meet you. –Loki

What do you want from me? What is this about? –Loki
This isn’t about you. –The Variant
Right. –Loki

 

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 3, “Lamentis”

You’re in my way. –Sylvie
You are my way! –Loki

I thought perhaps we could work together. But now I see you lack vision. So, either you’ll come willingly or you won’t. Either way, that’s how I get to meet the Time-Keepers. –Loki to Sylvie

I didn’t need your help! –Sylvie
You’re so weird! –Loki

Have you really got nothing else better to do? –Sylvie
Rude. –Loki

You’re not the only tech-savvy Loki. –Loki
You’re so weird. –Loki

Are you sure you’re a Loki? –Loki

 

 

You trying to enchant me? It won’t work. –Loki
Why? Because you’re a magician? –Sylvie
No, because my mind is too strong. –Loki

Don’t call me Variant. –Sylvie
I’m sorry, but I’m not calling some faded photocopy of me “Loki.” –Loki
Good. ‘Cause, that’s not who I am anymore. I’m Sylvie now. –Sylvie
Oh, you changed your name. Brilliant. –Loki
It’s called an alias. –Sylvie
It’s not very Loki-like. –Loki
Yeah? What exactly makes a Loki a Loki? –Sylvie
Independence, authority, style. –Loki

Brute force is no substitute for diplomacy and guile. –Loki
FYI that wasn’t even a plan. –Sylvie
Oh, really? –Loki
Plans have multiple steps. Dressing as a guard and getting on a train is just doing a thing. –Sylvie

She was a Queen of Asgard. She was good. Purely decent. –Loki about his Mother
Are you sure she was your mother? –Sylvie
Oh, no, she’s not actually. I was adopted. Is that a bit of a spoiler for you? Sorry about that. –Loki
No, I knew I was adopted. –Sylvie
What? They told you? –Loki
When I was young she’d do these little bits of magic for me. Like, turn a flower into a frog or cast fireworks over the water. It all seemed impossible, but she told me that one day I’d be able to do it too because… I could do anything. –Loki
She was the kinda person you’d want to believe in you. –Loki about his mother
Sounds like she does. –Sylvie

It’s remarkable that you even made it as far as you did. –Loki

 

 

Love is hate. –Sylvie

With charm like that, who could resist you? –Loki

Love is mischief then. –Sylvie

Love is a dagger. It’s a weapon to be wielded far away or up close. You can see yourself in it. It’s beautiful. Until it makes you bleed. But ultimately, when you reach for it… –Loki
It isn’t real. –Sylvie
Yeah. –Loki
Love is an imaginary dagger. –Sylvie
It doesn’t make sense, does it? –Loki
No. Terrible metaphor. –Sylvie
Damn. I thought I had something there. –Loki

 

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 4, “The Nexus Event”

You want to know how enchantment works? I have to make physical contact and then grab hold of their mind. –Sylvie
How? –Loki
It depends on the mind. Most are easy and I can overtake them instantly. Others, the stronger ones, it gets tricky. I’m in control, but they’re there, too. In order to preserve the connection, I have to create a fantasy from their memories. –Sylvie
And you call me a magician. –Loki

Do you have any idea how impossible it is to keep the timeline stable? The Time-Keepers are all that stand between us and full-scale calamity. –Ravonna Renslayer 

I remember Asgard. Not much, but I remember. My home, my people, my life. The universe wants to break free, so it manifests chaos. Like me being born the Goddess of Mischief. And as soon as that created a big enough detour from the Sacred Timeline, the TVA showed up, erased my reality, and took me, prisoner. I was just a child. I escaped. Stole a TemPad and I ran for a long, long time, which really sucked. Everywhere and every time I went, it caused a nexus event. Sent up a smoke flare. Because I’m not supposed to exist. Until, eventually, I figured out where to hide. And so that’s where I grew up, the ends of a thousand worlds. Now…that’s where I’ll die. –Sylvie

Do you think that what makes a Loki a Loki is the fact that we’re destined to lose? –Sylvie
No. We may lose, sometimes painfully, but we don’t die. We survive. –Loki

I should have an equal amount of security. This is insulting! –Loki

You know, it occurred to me that you’re not really the God of Mischief. –Mobius
Oh, here it comes. The folksy, dopey insult from the folksy dope. What am I? The God of Self-Sabotage, yeah? The God of Back-Stabbing? –Loki
Just kind of an asshole and a bad friend. Yeah, chew on that for a little bit. –Mobius

 

 

You. You conniving, craven, pathetic worm. –Lady Sif

You know, we brought in Kree, Titans, vampires. Why is it that two orphan demigods are such a pain in the ass? –Mobius

Two Variants of the same being, especially for you, forming this sick, twisted romantic relationship. That’s pure chaos. That could break reality. It’s breaking my reality right now. What an incredible seismic narcissist. You fell for yourself. –Mobius
Her name was Sylvie. –Loki

You’re all Variants! Everyone who works at the TVA. The Time-Keepers didn’t create you. They kidnapped you. They kidnapped you from the timeline and erased your memories. Memories she can access through enchantment. So before this, you had a past, maybe you had a family, a life. –Loki
Nice try. That was good. You two, what a pair. Gosh! Unbelievable. Wherever you go, it’s just death, destruction, the literal ends of worlds. –Mobius

So, I just have to trust the world of two Lokis? –Mobius
How about the word of a friend? –Loki

You could be whoever, whatever you wanna be, even someone good. I mean, just in case anyone ever told you different. –Mobius

You know where I’d go if I could go anywhere? Wherever it is I’m really from. Yeah, wherever I had a life before the TVA came along. Maybe I had a jet ski. That’s what I’d like to do. Just riding around on my jet ski. –Mobius
Prune him. –Renslayer 

Is that the only reason you brought us here? To kill us? I’ve lost track of the number of times I’ve been killed, so go ahead. Do your worst. –Loki to the Time-Keepers

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 5, “The Journey Into Mystery”

The dogma states that the end of time is still being rewritten. –Renslayer 

Nothing ever comes back from there. –Renslayer 

Don’t die isn’t a plan, it’s a general demand of living. –Loki

You’re Lokis. You should always have a plan. –Loki

Will someone please tell me what the hell is going on? –Loki

Stop wailing or you’ll signal Alioth. –Kid Loki
You mean the monster in the sky? –Loki

 

This is the place where the TVA drops its rubbish, everything they’ve ever pruned. –Kid Loki
And Alioth, he ensures none of it ever returns. –Kid Loki
It’s a living tempest that consumes matter and energy. They send entire branched realities here that are devoured in an instant. –Boastful Loki
We’re in a shark tank. Alioth is the shark. –Classic Loki

Why don’t you wear the horns? You let a child command you? –Loki
You’d do well to respect the boy. This is his kingdom. –Classic Loki
What was your Nexus Event, your majesty? –Loki
I killed Thor. –Kid Loki

What happened to finding the man behind the curtain? –Sylvie

 

That’s alligator for growling and saying “liar” at the same time. –Classic Loki
At least my Nexus Event wasn’t eating the wrong neighbor’s cat. –Boastful Loki

Take no offense, my friends, but blades are worthless in the face of a Loki sorcery. –Classic Loki

To tell you the truth, I missed my brother, and I wondered if he missed me, if anybody else did. –Classic Loki

I’m the same as all of you. –Loki

You said Alioth is what keeps us here. –Loki

You should be careful just jumping into a stranger’s car like that. –Mobius

 

Ah, hello. Which one of us are you? –President Loki
This is a nightmare. –Loki

My army, my throne. –President Loki

Why you beef-witted, half-faced scrubs. –President Loki

Why the hell is there an alligator in here? –President Loki

We lie and we cheat, we cut the throat of every person who trusts us, and for what? Power. Glorious power. Glorious purpose! –Classic Loki

 

 

We cannot change. We’re broken, every version of us. Forever. And whenever one of us dares try to fix themselves, they’re sent here to die. –Classic Loki

Just because it’s more complicated doesn’t mean it’s bad. –Loki
It doesn’t mean it’s good. –Kid Loki

Us as a child, us in the future, and us as an alligator. Best not to question it. –Loki

Throw a rock out here and you’ll hit a Loki. –Mobius

 

Why am I locked in here? –B-15
You freed the variant. You were disloyal to the TVA. –Renslayer
Disloyal? –B-15
Did you think you’d escape punishment? –Renslayer
Disloyal to who? You were in the Time-Keepers’ chambers. They weren’t real. –B-15
And why do you think that changes anything? –Renslayer
That changes everything. The people need to know the truth. –B-15
No, the TVA needs stability. And until we figure out what’s going on, that is what it will get. So you need to tell me everything. –Renslayer
What exactly do you want from me? –B-15
You had a link with the Variant. I want you to tell me what drives her. –Renslayer
Revenge drives her. –B-15
Killing the Time-Keepers. But they turned out to be fake, in case you forgot. So she’ll be searching for whomever created them. –B-15
This isn’t about protecting the TVA at all, is it? You just want to find out whoever is behind all of this, too. You’ll never find them. Not before she does. –B-15
And why is that? –Renslayer
You only want it. She needs it. –B-15
This isn’t about protecting the TVA at all, is it? You just want to find whoever is behind this, too. –B-15

You don’t have to do this. –Sylvie
I don’t even know what we’re doing. –Loki

It’s cold. –Loki
Mmhm. –Sylvie
I can conjure one for you, if you like. –Loki
Can you conjure me a new outfit? You have no idea how uncomfortable something like this is. –Sylvie

It’s not very snuggly. Is it a tablecloth? –Sylvie
No, it’s a blanket. –Loki
Thank you. –Sylvie
My pleasure. –Loki

How do I know that, in the final moments, you won’t betray me? –Sylvie
Listen, Sylvie, I…I betrayed everyone who ever loved me. I betrayed my father, my brother…my home. I know what I did. And I know why I did it. And that’s not who I am anymore. Okay? I won’t let you down. –Loki

Thank you, my friend. –Loki
You’re my favorite. –Mobius to Sylvie

How is he doing that? –Sylvie
I think we’re stronger than we realize. –Loki

GLORIOUS PURPOSE!!! Ha ha ha ha ha!! –Classic Loki

Open your eyes. –Sylvie

Best Quotes – Loki Series Episode 6, “For All Time. Always.“

Way to go Tic Tac! –Sam Wilson (to Scott Lang becoming Giant-Man, Captain America: Civil War)

That’s how you punch. –Hope van Dyne (to Scott Lang while training, Ant-Man)

sound of the Incredible Hulk roaring

Wakanda Forever! –Black Panther (to the Wakandan Army, Avengers: Infinity War)

You haven’t heard of me. –Scott Lang (to Sam Wilson at New Avengers Facility, Ant-Man)

Let me put you on hold. –Natasha Romanoff (to Agent Coulson before fighting captors, The Avengers)

Dance off, bro! –Peter Quill (challenging Ronan the Accuser, Guardians of the Galaxy)

The sound of Thor’s hammer, Mjolnir, flying

He’s a friend from work! –Thor (about Hulk during their arena fight, Thor: Ragnarok)

I can do this all day. –2012 Captain America (to 2023 Captain America, Avengers: Endgame)

Yeah, I know… –2023 Captain America (to 2012 Captain America, Avengers: Endgame)

I’ll show you ferocity. –Hank Pym (after punching Mitchell Carson in the face, Ant-Man)

Higher, further, faster, baby. –Carol Danvers (to Maria Rambeau, Captain Marvel)

We have a Hulk. –Loki (quoting Iron Man to Thanos, Avengers: Infinity War)

We’re gonna jump on that spaceship and get out of here. Wanna come? –Korg (to Loki, Thor: Ragnarok)

Who the hell’s Bucky? –Winter Soldier (after hearing his name from Steve Rogers, Captain America: The Winter Soldier)

I have part of a plan! –Peter Quill (to the Guardians of the Galaxy before defending Xandar, Guardians of the Galaxy)

Puny god. –Incredible Hulk (after tossing Loki like a wet noodle, The Avengers)

Dormammu, I’ve come to bargain. –Doctor Strange (to Dormammu in the Dark Dimension, Doctor Strange)

There was an idea. –Nick Fury (about the concept of the Avengers Initiative, The Avengers)

You are an Avenger. –Clint Barton (to Wanda Maximoff during the Battle of Sokovia, Avengers: Age of Ultron)

You will never be…a god. –Loki (to Thanos before being killed, Avengers: Infinity War)

That’s my secret Cap…I’m always angry. –Bruce Banner (before turning into the Hulk, The Avengers)

You sent my suit through the mail? –Hank Pym (to Scott Lang, Ant-Man & The Wasp)

Time is the true enemy of us all. –Kaecilius (to Doctor Strange  about his mission, Doctor Strange)

Glorious Purpose! –Richard E Grant’s Classic Loki’s last words, “Loki” Episode 5)

What is grief if not love persevering? –Vision (to Wanda about love, “WandaVision” Episode 8)

Open your eyes! –Sylvie (to Loki after they enchant Alioth, “Loki” Episode 5)

If anyone was ever gonna make it back from The Void, I suppose it was gonna be you.
–Ravonna
Oh, well, you know, one’s man Void is another man’s piece of cake. –Mobius

He Who Remains. –Loki
Not for much longer. –Sylvie

Both of us…together on the Timeline. –Loki
It’s crazy, but he could make it work. All of it. Everything. Exactly the way you’ve always wanted. And you can have it all, together. –Miss Minutes
It’s fiction. –Sylvie
We write our own destiny now. –Loki

Well, if you think it’s a bad idea, I’d prefer you to speak your mind.  –Sylvie
No. Nothing to say. –Loki
That would be a first. –Sylvie

Why aren’t we seeing this the same way? –Sylvie
Because you can’t trust…and I can’t be trusted. –Loki

 

Loki is streaming now on Disney+

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